Mediocre children's pastors...

• Do everything themselves. They would never think of delegating or multiplying themselves in others. Their self-esteem relies on being a doer. They get insecure if others around them begin to demonstrate any leadership skills. 
• Never take risks. They never try anything that does not have a sure and predictable outcome. They would never think out of the box. They believe if it hasn't been done before there's probably a good reason why. 
• Are just waiting for the opportunity to "move up." Their real desire is to someday go into adult ministry or even become a Senior Pastor. Children's ministry is only a step to something else.
• Wait for people to volunteer. They would never be so confident as to approach and recruit good people to work with them. The fear of rejection is too strong. They would rather plead for help from the safety of the church bulletin.
• Have no clear vision. They would never be able to articulate any coherent reason why children's ministry exists, except to keep the little tikes out of the "main" service.
• Never give the children anything. Prizes and rewards are seen as "bribes." Even though God is a rewarder (Heb. 11:6), it is wrong for them to give away anything fun.
• Act goofy. They try so hard to relate to the children that everyone else thinks they need medication.
• Clutter the walls with anything that will stick. They believe if a child drew it or made it, everyone else would love to see it plastered to the wall. 
• Sing nothing but songs that have no discernable spiritual content. They would never sing a praise song to the Lord that has scripture. They don't believe children are capable of praise and worship so every song has to be silly and void of any lasting value. As long as it has motions and mentions the name of anybody in the Bible, not much else matters. 
• Believe children's ministry should imitate the public school system. They stress education above all else and turn everything into a sterile classroom experience. They are not discouraged by the fact that public education has been less than effective. They plow forward anyway. They believe they have captured a child's heart for the Lord if they can get them to memorize the books of the Old Testament. 
• Are afraid to lead a child to profess a personal faith in Jesus. They fear offending the parents. They fear that the child doesn't understand enough (who does?). They fear everything except missing an opportunity to lead a child to salvation.
• Tolerate ineffective teachers. They are afraid to move people out of children's ministry and into a department more suited to their gifts. They fear offending any of the long-timers. They even tolerate the whiners who complain about anything and everything. They are so desperate for workers that anyone who can fog a mirror is welcome to join the children's ministry department indefinitely.  
• Never pray. They believe, because God is sovereign, He will do whatever He wants anyway. They are so afraid of being outside of the will of God that they have no faith to ask for anything specific.
• Won't learn anything new. They think they know it all because they have been teaching a long time. They are comfortable with what they know. Change is threatening. They would never attend a conference on a cruise ship because they are afraid people might think they will have too good of a time (I'm sorry, I couldn't resist that one).
• Always let money hold them back. They start with the money that is available and plan from there. They would never try to raise money for something they thought was important. "It costs too much" is a comforting phrase because it relieves them of pushing to the next level. And of course, they believe it would be selfish to ask God to provide. 
• Stay securely within the limits of their own denomination. Since their denomination is superior to all others, there is no reason to learn from anyone or anything outside of their group. All books, curriculum, music, etc. must originate from their own doctrinal perspective to be considered viable. 
• Never allow themselves to be stretched or challenged. They are easily offended by anything unfamiliar. They are threatened by large or successful children's ministries. Their capacity for taking offense continually limits them. 

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